Funny Fart Stories While Hunting

[348Winchester]

I have two.

The first one happened about 20 or 21 years ago. It was a very cold clear morning just before daybreak. I was walking up a logging road on mountain side that had been logged the previous spring/summer. Upon attaining the crest, I let out a massive fart. It was not long, maybe one second, but very loud. The clear, cold morning air must have allowed it to be carried a long way for I heard a deer blow loudly from the very bottom of the log cut which was easily 1/4 miles distant.

When my little girl was nine we were sitting in a two man stand overlooking a food plot. A meager spike came in and fed right in front of us. He was facing us. She ripped a colossal fart that caused the metal stand to ring like a giant tuning fork! It had to be a sharp note! F sharp would be my guess. That little buck tilted his head oddly as if trying to figure out what the hell that sound was. She then ripped another one that sounded like a Skil saw shredding a 3/4 inch sheet of plywood. I burst out laughing and the buck swapped ends and beat a hasty retreat. I laughed until I damn near passed out. We did not see anything else that evening.

 

[kkh325]

348Wichester I am still laughing after reading your post. That is so hilarious !

 

[TDW05]

That's hilarious lol

 

[Tweeter]

There was a guy on Facebook few years ago that supposedly had a huge buck at 20 and as he strained to pull his bow back he ripped and loud wet one and ran the deer off

 

[RockMcL]

If you watch where & what you eat before hunting it will help prevent non-funny fart stories while hunting

 

[tickweed]

I was elk hunting in Colorado with sev friends 15 or so years ago. It was well up in the morning, I was slipping up the side of a mountain, when I caught the distinct odor of a dead animal. I thought to myself, it could be a dead bull, maybe he's close, so I started looking. I kept tilting my head back, trying to trace the odor. As I slipped foward, I happened to look ahead, my buddy was hid behind a aspen, laughing his butt off. He had farted, and honestly, I would have ordered flowers if a florist had been near, cause he had died. I mean rotted. We still laugh about it.

 

[Long walker]

I was in an elevated box blind with a buddy as a guest on his lease. It started raining pretty good and he starts cracking off some bombs. I told him he better stop or he's going to run out of "air" space.

Sure enough he started to get that uh oh look and praying for it to stop raining. After about 10 minutes it let up and he was desperate so he bolts for the door.

The wooden steps up to it were a little rickety and as you can imagine slick from the rain. All of the sudden I hear whoa!! Crap! Then a bunch of noise that sounded like he fell. He did and hit his butt all the way down.

I looked down at him and he looks up at me and says "I don't need to poop no more". I couldn't take a breath for five minutes I was laughing so hard.

 

[KTS]

I was Muzzleloader hunting at LBL probably 30 years ago. I had walked way back in to this ridge that I had scouted previously before daylight.
It was probably 8:30 or 9:00 am. I hadn't seen or heard a thing.
Then the silence was broken, very loudly. I hear an extremely loud fart and then a loud pop. The pop sounded like a limb breaking. Well this kept going on, loud fart then loud pop.
I thought, what in the world is that, sounded kinda like a moose thrashing hell out of a tree then cuttin loose with a big fart.
I had to see what was going on so I started slipping down an old logging road that direction. It wasn't long before I could see it was sombody in a gray jumpsuit in a fallen tree top.
He would strain pulling on a big limb trying to break it and fart every single time.
I got close enough to speak to him to see what he was doing.
He said he was making a ground blind to hunt out of.
I said good luck and left.

 

[Tom Collins]

I was Muzzleloader hunting at LBL probably 30 years ago. I had walked way back in to this ridge that I had scouted previously before daylight.
It was probably 8:30 or 9:00 am. I hadn't seen or heard a thing.
Then the silence was broken, very loudly. I hear an extremely loud fart and then a loud pop. The pop sounded like a limb breaking. Well this kept going on, loud fart then loud pop.
I thought, what in the world is that, sounded kinda like a moose thrashing hell out of a tree then cuttin loose with a big fart.
I had to see what was going on so I started slipping down an old logging road that direction. It wasn't long before I could see it was sombody in a gray jumpsuit in a fallen tree top.
He would strain pulling on a big limb trying to break it and fart every single time.
I got close enough to speak to him to see what he was doing.
He said he was making a ground blind to hunt out of.
I said good luck and left.

 

[UTGrad]

I got some brand new Scent Lok clothing years ago and confirmed the charcoal fibers worked cause I was passing hot gas on the stand and couldn't smell it.

 

[philsanchez76]

Haven't laughed this hard in months. Best thread ever.

 

[Crappieaddict]

I don't care how old and mature I get, a good fart story makes me laugh out loud. Well done.

 

[archer19]

Yesterday, son had already got down from ladder stand.
I turned around and ripped a 3 second blast…….
My son looked up and said " lord….was that real?"

 

[wsm]

LOL ,love the story

 

[348Winchester]

Yesterday, son had already got down from ladder stand.
I turned around and ripped a 3 second blast…….
My son looked up and said " lord….was that real?"

Three seconds is a long-ass fart!

I'm jealous.

 

[348Winchester]

I don't care how old and mature I get, a good fart story makes me laugh out loud. Well done.

Farting is proof of God's wisdom and sense of humor.

Farting is funny.

Farting feels good.

If we could not fart we would eventually explode.

Farts sometimes smell bad.

Sometimes you get the bonus package which is bad.

So, you see, God puts balance in everything.

 

[UT-longbeard]

This is great lol.

 

[KTS]

Remember the old rhyme from back in school.
Beans, beans good for the heart
The more you eat the more you fart
The more you fart the better you feel
So eat beans for every meal

 

[dogmatik]

Most of my family is known for being extra gassy. When we take the annual trip to Tennessee, the boys all "load up" to make the trip more enjoyable. One time my brother decided to eat nothing but hard boiled eggs all day before the trip and he would update us on his progress, complete with pictures of his declining stash of eggs. That evening, after eating 15 eggs all day, my brother swung by the house to pick me up. As we were loading the truck, he got a worried look on his face and said he had to use the bathroom. He came back outside all mad because he just lost all of his ammunition. We all breathed a sigh of relief!

Before cell phones, or reliable service in the sticks of Tennessee, we used those little radios. My brother would always key up the mic, and let one rip. Nothing could keep you from laughing as the silence of the woods are disrupted by a loud fart coming through the radio, and you know that 4 others all heard the same thing.
Brothers are the best.

 

[Headhunter]

My brother and myself were on the way home from a fishing trip. I was driving, he was sound asleep. Toyota tacoma extended cab. I mean he was asleep, I tried to tell him he needed to stay awake to make sure I stayed awake. I finally got to be ok and was awake and he passed out and started snoring. A pain hit me and I passed gas, I swear is was the world's smallest fart, maybe a fraction of a second and made zero noise. Windows up, heat on, kind of cool out, and the smell hit me and I thought, NO WAY! Worst smelling thing ever. I start keeping an eye on my brother and it did not take long. I saw him start waking up and when he did he yelled THAT STINKS! I was laughing so hard I had to pull over. When he told one of our friends, he said Holy Cow, you could have killed him! I told him it was payback for the beer and taco bell nights I drove him home.