Inheritance and its problems

BSK

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It would suck from a sentimental standpoint and the blood, sweat, and tears you've put in but if it came down to it sell the whole thing then take your part and buy another farm. Starting over would suck and you more than likely wouldn't have the amount of land you do now but it would be YOURS.
If we have to sell, my life of deer hunting is over. With only 10-15 years of hunting left in me, I would just hang it up. I'm not starting over.
 

moondawg

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Except anyone who thinks their spouse and children don't strongly influence them is fooling themselves.
True. I don't have a spouse or kids, so it's easy for me to say that. But for someone who has a spoiled (and maybe even toxic) spouse and and spoiled children, that's a different matter altogether.
 

BSK

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True. I don't have a spouse or kids, so it's easy for me to say that.
There's an old saying, "If momma ain't happy, nobody's happy." I can't tell you how true that is. An unhappy spouse can make your life a living Hell.
But for someone who has a spoiled (and maybe even toxic) spouse and and spoiled children, that's a different matter altogether.
I promise you, those who have toxic spouses or kids rarely recognize it (or refuse to acknowledge the obvious).
 

moondawg

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There's an old saying, "If momma ain't happy, nobody's happy." I can't tell you how true that is. An unhappy spouse can make your life a living Hell.

I promise you, those who have toxic spouses or kids rarely recognize it (or refuse to acknowledge the obvious).
Both are ABSOLUTELY true! I know the first from when I was married for 20 yrs. I didn't realize the second until earlier this year.
 

BMan

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I picked out two or three things I wanted (a bowl, a specific spoon, etc.) and told the others that's all I wanted. Wasn't my money or stuff to begin with, not going to fight over it.

Fortunately, it went smoothly and nobody got ruffled feathers.
 
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It would suck from a sentimental standpoint and the blood, sweat, and tears you've put in but if it came down to it sell the whole thing then take your part and buy another farm. Starting over would suck and you more than likely wouldn't have the amount of land you do now but it would be YOURS.
Absolutely! Never be dependent on someone else for anything that is important to you, and never get attached to something that isn't yours! I have learned this the hard way also. I am so glad I bought a piece of land 20 something years ago!
 

Wildcat

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There's an old saying, "If momma ain't happy, nobody's happy." I can't tell you how true that is. An unhappy spouse can make your life a living Hell.

I promise you, those who have toxic spouses or kids rarely recognize it (or refuse to acknowledge the obvious).
^^^^^^Guys read that again!!^^^^^^^^^^^

I've never been married but I have seen what spouses CAN and WILL do to families and their traditions and business.
 

BSK

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Absolutely! Never be dependent on someone else for anything that is important to you, and never get attached to something that isn't yours! I have learned this the hard way also. I am so glad I bought a piece of land 20 something years ago!
Problem is, all of us expected the property to stay in the family. Maybe that happens and maybe that doesn't. We shall see.
 

rem270

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If we have to sell, my life of deer hunting is over. With only 10-15 years of hunting left in me, I would just hang it up. I'm not starting over.
I would probably be the same way. If for some reason I ever have to sell mine then I'll just be done. So glad I decided to buy it in 2014 when my aunt was causing a big ruckus. I have hunted here since 1995. My granddad bought it in 2008. I bought it from him in 2014 because I knew what was going to happen later down the road once he was gone. I bought his tractor from him in 2017. He passed in 2019. There's no way I'd still have this property today with my aunt the way she is.
 

BSK

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I would probably be the same way. If for some reason I ever have to sell mine then I'll just be done. So glad I decided to buy it in 2014 when my aunt was causing a big ruckus. I have hunted here since 1995. My granddad bought it in 2008. I bought it from him in 2014 because I knew what was going to happen later down the road once he was gone. I bought his tractor from him in 2017. He passed in 2019. There's no way I'd still have this property today with my aunt the way she is.
If I could afford to buy it, I would. But it's a little out of my price range!
 

BigAl

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If we have to sell, my life of deer hunting is over. With only 10-15 years of hunting left in me, I would just hang it up. I'm not starting over.
I'm surprised with all the work you've done for hunters and properties you couldn't get in somewhere. Or are you just not interested in that type of hunting situation?
 

BSK

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I'm surprised with all the work you've done for hunters and properties you couldn't get in somewhere. Or are you just not interested in that type of hunting situation?
Correct. I'm invited to hunt my clients' properties all the time, but just not interested in that. For me, the thrill was getting to know my own place. And even after almost 40 years, I'm still learning its secrets.
 

Chapman

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If you and one or two of your siblings did not want to sell the undivided acreage, the 6 heirs would have to survey the property and give you and your sibling(s) their share. The others could then sell the rest of the property. It seems to me that the remaining property would be far less valuable as a hunting property if 1/3 to 1/2 of the original property bordered another deer hunting group ( you and 1 or 2 or more siblings)
 

BSK

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Maybe if you and the remaining heirs that want to keep the farm partner up and buy out who ever wants the money? Its going to be alot cheaper for you to buy it and it stays in the family.
Depends on how the property is valued. Maybe we could afford it and maybe we couldn't.
 

Bambi Buster

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Have him do a will, and suggest to him only siblings should be in it. If a sibling wishes to share with their spouse or children, then they can out of their share

.
Below from Post #09 of this thread:
BSK:

I have absolutely no doubt there are legal ways of setting up this part of the inheritance that could be used to prevent the break-up of these assets. However, unfortunately at his age, my father has just washed his hands of it all. He's sort of taking a "I'll be dead, I don't care what happens" attitude. And even more unfortunate is that some members of the family DO NOT want these type of legal agreements investigated or pursued.
 

BSK

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Correct Bambi Buster. My father has a Will and it states all of the siblings own the property and associated management accounts equally. Beyond that, it states nothing about how the property will be handled. And he has no interest in delving into any type of legal documents/arrangements that would hold the property together. He's got a "It's yours jointly. You do what you want with it" attitude. We've warned him this arrangement will almost guarantee the property has to be sold. But I honestly think any type of FLP or LLC at this stage is too complicated for him, so he's just washing his hands of it. I'm looking into these type of legal arrangements myself, and will present ideas to him. But will he except them? No idea. Will all the siblings accept them? No idea, but I'm starting to doubt a few will (because they want to sell the property and get their percentage).
 

Dean Parisian

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10 ideas for everyone in a situation like this....................

One. Everything in writing.
Two. Share the legal will now with family members.
Three. Have a zoom call before his passing with all family members
Four. Have someone your father respects and will listen to discuss the nuts and bolts of "When you Die this will happen "...........
Five. Write down what was said, when, dates, keep accurate notes of who said what, when. A dedicated notebook is cheap!
Six. Keep the executor informed of everything
Seven. Keep discussions civil
Eight. Get a valuation on the property now before Date of Death
Nine. Decide what law firm or attorney will handle the estate work before it is needed.
Ten. Keep your banker informed of what might happen if the property is pledged as collateral to pay off family members.
 

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