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#3135949 - 01/23/13 11:56 AM Re: Can't believe what we were told! [Re: Crow Terminator]
Hangnail
12 Point


Registered: 11/30/00
Posts: 7267
Loc: Murfreesboro, TN

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I'd think your MIL has earned her right to do what she thinks is best for her. Should be a short discussion, hopefully.
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#3135956 - 01/23/13 12:12 PM Re: Can't believe what we were told! [Re: Crow Terminator]
Stalkhunter
10 Point


Registered: 07/17/11
Posts: 3964
Loc: Knoxville TN

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Time for hard love, tell them to stick it were the sun dont shine. if your mom has a good ortho, hips are not as rough as they use to be. my brother is 53 just had one aways back. she needs to do the theropy and do what they say. if she is in good health she should do fine..

Edited by Stalkhunter (01/23/13 12:13 PM)
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#3135961 - 01/23/13 12:18 PM Re: Can't believe what we were told! [Re: Unicam]
rabbit hunter
14 Point


Registered: 03/04/10
Posts: 9184
Loc: Beech Bluff, TN

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 Originally Posted By: Unicam
1. Tell them to get a babysitter full time and take the load of the MIL.

2. Tell them to grow up and come back and see you after they do.

3. Enjoy your Mini Vaca!!!!

Life is to short for stupidity, even if they are family members.....



What he said.....
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#3135994 - 01/23/13 12:48 PM Re: Can't believe what we were told! [Re: rabbit hunter]
BlackBelt
10 Point


Registered: 08/09/08
Posts: 3190
Loc: SouthWest TN

content Online
You know, they are still family and no need to cause a life-long rift over a temporary situation.
Your in-laws want childcare. Just laugh at that like they said something hysterical and tell them they will have to figure that one out on their own. I wouldnt say anything to cause problems down the road. You may actually need something from them one day, or their kids might need you later in their lives.
Just blow off what you dont want to do, and happily do the rest.

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#3136013 - 01/23/13 01:03 PM Re: Can't believe what we were told! [Re: BlackBelt]
Kimber45 Moderator
Peace Maker
16 Point


Registered: 07/10/08
Posts: 18031
Loc: Close to Jackson, TN

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Man what a mess... Prayers on the way!

I'd have to laugh at the BIL/SIL like BB said as if they were joking, as they are either nearly insane......... or joking.

Taking care of the MIL should be a shared responsibility within the skill levels of those who can help.

I will say this.... skill levels can be important, or not. Wife and I bought Matthew home from Vandy last February and did ABX infusions via a port that had to be flushed and handled VERY carefully - with our skill level being Zilch!! Wife was scared to do it so for 3-weeks I did every infusion THEN I ran a fever, had a cold or something, and she had to learn. Honeslty home care stuff is not that bad if you have a patient nurse to walk you through what to do..

Hang in there and work it out. Hopefully the BIL/SIL will stop and realize they are only thinking about themselves and grow up a little.
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Patriotism is not short, frenzied outbursts of emotion, but the tranquil and steady dedication of a lifetime.

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#3136014 - 01/23/13 01:04 PM Re: Can't believe what we were told! [Re: BlackBelt]
Hangnail
12 Point


Registered: 11/30/00
Posts: 7267
Loc: Murfreesboro, TN

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By reading the original post, there is already a lifelong rift. To have the means to do what your responsiblities require of you, yet choose to mooch and dictate to others is too much.
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#3136029 - 01/23/13 01:16 PM Re: Can't believe what we were told! [Re: Hangnail]
Bowdacious
Skillet
16 Point


Registered: 09/01/00
Posts: 16178
Loc: over here

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Sounds like one if them needs to quit and take care of their kids or lay daycare like everyone else. Ask them if they will pay you or the wife 30k per year to do it. If not, the responsibility is to be shared. They owe her for keeping the kids anyway.
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#3136071 - 01/23/13 01:39 PM Re: Can't believe what we were told! [Re: Kimber45]
leader
16 Point


Registered: 08/10/06
Posts: 11109
Loc: Knox

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You can always go a different route.
Your MIL has made a decision to go to a rehab clinic,end of discussion.
On the other side if you like the kids just plainly say, "we would love to be able to help with the kids but we have to put our household and marriage first, we will be happy to look after your kids on occasion through this if you both need a break but not if it overlaps our work schedule"
Other advice is this let your wife do most of the talking because it is her mother and siblings, not directly your business
UNTIL it effects you OR until they keep pushing. Then choose your words calmly and wisely,these people are going to be in your life a LOOOOOOOOONG time....
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THE ONLY DUMB QUESTIONS ARE THOSE NEVER ASKED!

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#3136076 - 01/23/13 01:41 PM Re: Can't believe what we were told! [Re: Bowdacious]
leader
16 Point


Registered: 08/10/06
Posts: 11109
Loc: Knox

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 Originally Posted By: Bowdacious
Sounds like one if them needs to quit and take care of their kids or lay daycare like everyone else. Ask them if they will pay you or the wife 30k per year to do it. If not, the responsibility is to be shared. They owe her for keeping the kids anyway.


^^^^

I was actually thinking of them paying for your wife to keep the kids also
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THE ONLY DUMB QUESTIONS ARE THOSE NEVER ASKED!

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#3136087 - 01/23/13 01:46 PM Re: Can't believe what we were told! [Re: Bowdacious]
Deer Assassin
Non-Typical


Registered: 08/01/03
Posts: 87055
Loc: Kingston Springs

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crow

i have never met you but always had a lot of respect for you as PMC has always spoke highly of you

how you didnt keep from getting I rate with them people is beyond me

i have no issue with yall helping MIL but it is the responsibility of all 3 of her children

and for you to quit job to baby sit their kids man you dont want to know what im thinking heck it pisses me off they need to take care of their own kids
i hate people that take advantage of others with thier kids my sis is running mom n dad in the ground baby sitting my nephew while they are having another

i had one kid for a reason it is all i want and now have another by marriage

they need to take car of their on kids


btw hope yall have a great vacation
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